batsutousai: (HP-motherseyes-Harry)
[personal profile] batsutousai
Title: Abandon
Author: [ profile] batsutousai
Beta: [ profile] magickmaker17
Pairings: Harry/Tom(Voldemort)
Warnings: This will have slash(Guys on guys, ppl.). This also has mentions of child abuse. Perhaps a bit mild…
Disclaim Her: JELLO!!



Chapter 12


Harry was shocked to see Tom sitting at their normal table in front of the café that morning. He slid into the seat across from the man, noticing the dark rings under the man’s eyes. “I thought you had to work until two.”

Tom frowned up at him. “Everyone left me alone after I used the Cruciatus Curse on Bella for smiling at a joke Rodolphus made.”

“Eh. She deserved it.” Harry shrugged.

Tom couldn’t help but smile at that.

“Are you okay? You look like shit.”

“I’m tired.”

“Didn’t get any sleep?”

“I didn’t even bother.” Tom rested his head on his arms and closed his eyes. “I was thinking too much.”

“Must be painful, being a genius and all that.” Harry sighed.

Tom glared at the young man across from him. “You’re nice.”

“It’s part of my charm.”

Tom snorted and stood suddenly. “Harry, I need a drink. Come with me?”

“Tom…” Harry stared at the man warily. “Getting drunk isn’t going to help your mental state, you know.”

“I know.” The Dark Lord offered a crooked smile. “But it might give me some peace.”

“Okay, I’ll come with you.” Harry stood. “But you have to hand over your wand. For all I know, you’re a violent drunk. The last thing I need is a drunk Dark Lord in Muggle London.”

Tom shook his head and handed over the thin rod. “I think you’d be able to handle me, though.”

“So, are you violent when you’re drunk?” Harry enquired as they headed towards the nearest Muggle pub.

“No clue.” The older wizard shrugged. “I don’t do the drunk thing. People might attack me while I’m intoxicated.”

“What makes you think I won’t?”

“Using a line Dumbledore once used on me: Because you just asked me that, my dear boy.”

Harry sniggered and held the pub door open for Tom, then followed him in. “I’ll find a table in some nice, dark, quiet corner.”

“Whatever.” Tom waved him off before heading up to the front to order a drink.

Harry sighed and hunted down a table in the corner. He muttered a quick Silencing Spell under his breath, making it even more private.

“Have I mentioned that I hate the smell of alcohol?” Tom complained as he sat across from Harry with a couple bottles of beer.

“Then why would you want to drink it?” Harry enquired as Tom attempted to pull off the top of a bottle.

“I’ve heard it’s fun?” The man shrugged, still working with the top. “Damn it.”

Harry rolled his eyes, took the bottle, and hexed the top off. “Fun?” He sighed as he handed the bottle back.

“Yup.” Tom took a sip and shuddered. “Ew.”

Harry sniggered. “Worse than a potion?”

“Depends on who made it,” Tom shot back with a wicked smile. “I wouldn’t drink a potion made by Severus if you paid me.”

“Oh really? And who makes all the potions for your side?”

“Severus.” Tom snorted. “However, I make my own and switch them out for the ones he hands out.”

Harry laughed. “Wish I could do that at school!”

“Ha. Your loss.” Tom blinked down at his bottle, which was half empty. “Whoa. Where’d it all go?”

Harry groaned. “You drank it.”

“I did?”

“Are you drunk already?”

“I don’t know.”


Tom drank some more of his beer.

Harry read the label on one of the other bottles.

Tom drank more of his beer.

Harry picked at something on the table.

“This stuff really does taste bad, you know,” Tom informed his companion, finishing the bottle.

Harry slammed his head into the table with a groan.


“Yes, Tom?” Harry sighed to the table.

“Can you open this for me?”

Harry hexed the top off again and returned to picking at crud on the table.

There was a long pause.


“Yes, Tom?”

“I know too many Weasleys.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Well, I’ve met Fred and George…”


“They even gave me pranks...”


“Which I’ve yet to use…”



“You should use them.”

“Or so you’ve said.”

“Instead of Crucio.”

“That’s no fun.”

“Less of a chance of them going insane when you really lose your temper.”

“Harry, they’d think I’d gone insane!”

“Isn’t that the idea?”

Tom groaned.


“Riiight…” Tom ran a hand through his hair, then watched in interest as dandruff showered down on the table.


“I need a shower.”

“Not as bad as Snape.”

“No. Not as bad as Severus.” Tom shook his head. “Never as bad as Severus.”

“Are you okay?”

“Is it true?”

“Is what true?”

Tom met Harry’s eyes. “Do you fancy me?”

Harry inhaled sharply.

“You do, then.” Tom cocked his head to one side. “What’s it like?”

“What’s what like?”

“Fancying people?”



“I don’t know.”

“You don’t know.”

“I can’t… I can’t explain it in words.”

“Oh.” Tom glanced down at his beer. “How do you know?”


“How do you know when you fancy someone?”

“I didn’t.”


“Gin figured it out.”

“She calls herself your surrogate sister, you know. Threatened to hunt me down if I stopped talking to you.”

“Well, she is like a sister, I guess.” Harry shrugged. “But I’ll tell her no more threats. Really.”

“No, no. It’s rather nice. No one threatens me. They’re too scared.” Tom laughed sadly. “There are people, like you and Dumbledore, who are threats to me, but you’d never come right out and say you’re going to kill me.”

“No. We don’t.”

“I like knowing someone with enough spunk to do that. Adds spice to life.”

“Oh, Merlin. You’re totally pissed.”

“Am I?”

“Yes. You don’t go off on tirades like this when you’re sober.”

“You’ve been paying attention?”


“That was the point though, right?”

“I suppose.”

“Good. I’ve finally done something right.”

“You do plenty right!”

“Is killing people right?”


“I never do anything right.”

“Getting drunk isn’t quite right either, you know.”

“Ah, but it is allowed by society.”

“To a certain degree.”

“Well, that’s true. You’re not supposed to get drunk. You’re not the right age yet.”


“What do Muggles call them?”

“Call what?”

“Designated drivers…”


“Are you my designated driver, Harry?”


“Can’t really be my designated apparator, though.”

“Well, you’d better not get so drunk you can’t apparate back, then.”

“I think it’s too late.”


“Want some?” Tom offered Harry his bottle of beer.

“Didn’t we just have this talk?”


Harry sighed. “So, you were upset because of Gin’s letter?”

“Sort of.”

“Sort of?”

“I got…confused…”

“Happens to everyone, Tom.”

“Not to me!”

“Fine, fine. Not to you.” Harry rolled his eyes. “How were you confused?”

“I don’t understand my feelings…”

“What feelings?”

“Whether I fancy you or just like you as a friend or what…” Tom shrugged, not noticing Harry’s startled look. “Nagini got annoyed with me.”

“If I were a snake, I’d probably get annoyed with you too.” Harry snorted. “You don’t tend to make a lot of sense when you talk about feelings, you know.”

“I don’t suppose I do…” Tom took a sip of his beer. “I never had any feelings to make sense of before.”

“You had anger.”

“Yeah… And hate and possessiveness.”

“I didn’t know possessiveness was a feeling.”

“I think it is.”

“Okay. Maybe it is.”

“Maybe it’s not and I’m just messed up.”


“I am messed up, you know.”

Everyone is messed up.”

“Eh. Not you.”

“No, trust me. I’m just as messed up as the rest of the world.”

“I don’t think so.”


“No. I mean it!”

“Okay! Okay! Sorry I doubted you! Sit down!”

Tom slid back into his seat, eyes downcast. “Sorry.”

“It’s fine. Just don’t start throwing things.” Harry paused. “Give me those bottles.”

Tom grimaced. “I won’t throw anything.”

“You sure?”

“I haven’t yet.”

“Oh, well, yeah. I suppose that’s true.”

“So. Who’s the next Weasley you’re introducing me to?”

“I didn’t introduce you to Gin. She introduced herself.”

“Yeah. That’s true.”

“And Fred and George don’t really know who you are.”

“They’d freak.”

“No doubt. Ron would cart me off to St. Mungo’s. Percy’s still not talking to the family. Molly would freak out. Arthur would give me odd looks…” Harry sighed. “I don’t know how Bill and Charlie would take it.”

“Miss Weasley is rather mild.”

“Well, yes. But, she got to know your sixteen-year-old self first.”

“I was far from nice as sixteen.”

“Obviously. You opened the Chamber of Secrets when you were sixteen.”

“Did you just insult me?”

“Oh, you caught that, did you?”

“I may be intoxicated, but I am far from stupid.”

“You’re getting there, I’ve got to tell you.”

“Shut up, Harry.”

Harry shrugged. “You like Gin?”

“She’s amusing. Lucius is always complaining about her.”

“More than me?”

“Oh, no. No one is complained about more than you.”

“Good. I like knowing I’ve made a mark.”

“A mark? Harry, you’re the bloody Boy-Who-Lived. You don’t need to ‘make a mark’!”

“Harry needs to make a mark. The Boy-Who-Lived can go fuck himself.”

“Oh, aren’t you vulgar.”

“And aren’t you pissed.”

“Stuff it, Potter.”

Harry smirked.



“Eh? Oh, Muggle term. Nearly forgot that one…”


“Right.” Tom paused. “Why aren’t you in Slytherin?”

Harry laughed. “I told the Hat not to put me there. What brought this on?”

“I keep thinking you should be a Slytherin, that’s all. More so when I actually talk to you like this.”

“What? When you’re drunk?”

Tom managed a glare. “You know what I mean. Prat.”


“Any time. Give me back my wand.”

“I don’t think so.”

“I just want to hex ‘Prat’ into your forehead.”

“Definitely not.”

“Oh, come on, Harry.”



“I think you’ve had enough to drink.”

“What makes you say that?”

“You’re getting ridiculous.”

“Am I?”

“Do you have to ask?”

“Well, yes.”

“Yes. You are getting ridiculous.”


Harry rolled his eyes. “I’m going to regret this later, but, come on.” He stood, dispelling the Silencing Charm around the table.


“I’m taking you back to my room. If I send you back like this, all your followers will attack you. Come on.”

“I didn’t know you cared.”

Harry pulled Tom up and led him from the pub. “Of course I care. If they kill you, what’ll I be good for?”


“Wonderful. I knew you’d think of something.”

“I’m just smart like that.”

“Tom, keep walking.”


“Just shut up and keep walking, okay?”




“I suppose.” Harry closed the door lightly. “There’s only one bed, though.”


“Don’t worry. I’ll take the couch if you end up spending the night.”

“You have an owl.”

“Eh?” Harry blinked up at Pig. “Oh, it’s just Pig.”


“Ron’s owl.”

“Why did he name it Pig?”

“Well, Gin named him Pigwidgeon, and he wouldn’t answer to anything else, so Ron nicknamed him Pig.”

“Stupid name.”

“Pigwidgeon, or Pig?” Harry enquired, untying the letter from the owl. It was in Ron’s handwriting.


“I agree.” Harry pulled the letter open and read through it quickly. “Ah. I knew that. And that. Idiot.”


“Gin’s cover for writing to you is that she’s really writing to me. Ron’s decided she has another crush on me because she’s sending me so many letters.”

“Oh. Smart girl.”


“You going to write him back?”

“Nah. He can stew.”

“Nice of you.”

“Well, it’s not my fault he’s being a right prat about the whole thing.”


“Shut up and go to sleep.”

“I’m not tired.”

“And I am not dealing with a drunk Tom Riddle. There’s some Dreamless Sleep in the bathroom. Take some and let me read this.”

“Now that book is illegal.”

“See? You’ve corrupted me.”

“Good.” Tom wandered into the bathroom. “Who made this stuff?”

“Me. Not Snape. Me.”

“Oh, good.” Tom settled himself on the bed and drank the stuff. “Oh, even better.”

“Yes, I flavour the potions when I make them. I found out how to in a book I got last year.”

“That’s good.”

“Shut up and go to sleep.”

“Don’t hex me.”



“Just go to sleep, Tom.”


“I feel sick.”

“That’s what you get for getting pissed.”


“Don’t throw up on the bed.”

“What’s this? No ‘Good morning’?”

“It’s dinner time.”

“Good evening, then.”

“Go throw up already.”

“I don’t have to.”

“You’re turning green.”

Harry smirked as Tom fled to the bathroom, then went back to bottling a potion he’d been working on.

“What are you making?”

Harry pointed to the book next to him.

“I have no clue what that does.” Tom blinked. “It’s Dark Arts, you know.”

Harry shrugged. “Fred and George asked me to make it. They don’t have the time.”

“You’re going to get into trouble.”

“Fat chance. I’m the saviour for the Light. They can’t quite throw me in Azkaban.”

“No. I don’t suppose they can, can they?”

“Here.” Harry held up a bottle of deep blue potion.

“What is it?”

“Potion to help with alcohol-induced headaches. I made a whole batch for Seamus when he owled me yesterday. Good thing I hadn’t sent them off yet.”

“Why would your friend Seamus need this?” Tom asked as he took the stuff, shuddering at the taste.

“No, I can’t find anything to make it taste better,” Harry apologised. “And Seamus finally learned how to turn stuff into rum. He’s Irish.”

“I figured that from the name.” Tom set the bottle on Harry’s work table. “Thanks.”

“Helps me too. I get headaches when you get them.”

“Oh, you must have them all the time.”

“Only when you’ve got a really bad one, like now.”


Harry snorted.

Tom sat back down on the bed and watched Harry work quietly for a long moment. “You’re a good guy.”


“You’re making illegal potions for a couple of your friends and making another potion to help another friend keep from getting a headache because he got pissed illegally.” Tom sighed.

“Oh. I suppose that’s true.”


“I’m good at Potions?” Harry peeked over his shoulder at his guest. “If I don’t have Slytherins sabotaging my work or Snape glaring at me until I totally mess up, I’m pretty good.”

“Really? Wow. I never would have guessed.”

Harry snorted and went back to his work.

“I feel like a teenager.”

“How so?”

“I–“ Tom frowned down at his hands. “Nothing. Never mind.”

Harry sighed and capped the last bottle, then spelled the cauldron clean before sitting down next to Tom. “What?”

“Trying to figure my feelings out, I guess.”

“It’s not just teenagers that do that.”

“No, I guess not.” Tom laid down on the bed and stared up at the ceiling.

Harry turned and watched the older wizard for a long moment. “Oh, that’s right!”


“Your wand. It’s next to the cauldron.”

“I can get it later.”

“I’ll get it now…”

Tom reached out and grabbed Harry’s arm, stopping him. Harry looked back at him with a frown. “Later.”


“Harry, will you kiss me?”

Harry’s eyes widened in shock. “What?”

“Kiss me.”


“I’m thinking straight.”

“That’s not what I’m worried abo–“

Tom cut the boy off by pulling him down for a sharp kiss. Harry shut up and kissed him back.

When they pulled apart, Harry buried his face in Tom’s shirt. “Damn you.”

Tom enclosed the boy in a hug. “I think I’ve figured it out. Nagini’ll be so proud.”


“I don’t fancy you.”



“What then?” Harry peeked up into the scarlet eyes.

“It’s more than that.”


“Harry Potter, I do believe I love you.”

Harry gasped. “Tom…”

“And I’ve found a good way to shut you up, now that I think about it.”


The Dark Lord just pulled the young man into a kiss again and Harry decided he’d let it go.

For a while.


A/N: THIS is where I’ve been going, damn it! *dances* I finally got them to kiss! I’m so happy!! *runs into a table* Ow… T.T
Well? Did it suck? *coughs* Err… Right. Mind out of gutter…

~Batsutousai ^.^x

Abandon & Reclaim Series:
Abandon Chapters:
01 || 02 || 03 || 04 || 05 || 06 || 07 || 08 || 09 || 10
11 || 12 || 13 || 14 || 15 || 16 || 17 || 18 || 19 || 20
21 || 22 || 23 || 24 || 25 || 26 || 27 || 28 || 29 || 30
31 || 32 || 33 || 34 || 35 || 36 || 37 || 38 || 39 || 40
41 || 42 || 43 || 44 || 45 || 46 || 47
Reclaim Chapters:
One || Two || Three || Four || Five || Six || Seven || Eight || Nine || Ten
Eleven || Twelve || Thirteen || Fourteen || Fifteen
Side Stories:
Ginevra Weasley & Theodore Nott
Minerva McGonagall || Minerva McGonagall (again)


Date: 26/10/10 10:30 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
1) I'm happy, too! :)
2) Oh, it definitely didn't suck!
3) You have it wrong: mind back in the gutter!


batsutousai: (Default)

October 2017



Page generated 19 Oct 2017 17:58
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios