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batsutousaiTitle: The Bloody Feather
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
batsutousai
Rating: M/R
Pairings: Tom/Harry, others
Warnings: Clearly AU, OOCness, child abuse, anti-Dumbledore, pro-Hermione and Ron and Ginny
Summary: Even heroes need a saviour, and when an unknown admirer starts sending Harry letters the summer before his sixth year, it's time for Harry to meet his.
Disclaim Her: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
A/N: Sorry this took so long? I'm a lazy sod. But you knew that already.
Some parts of this chapter were given a serious rewrite – or expansion, mostly – from what's in my notebook. So if things are a little wonky from the rest of the fic, I apologise, but I didn't feel like re-reading when I was mostly going from the notebook. ^.^"
Also, the end of this hasn't been looked over again after being typed up. I figured you all be happier to get this now, rather than wait a couple hours for me to sleep, then read it all back over. *sweatdrop*
-0-0-0-
-0-0-0-
The next few months were a blur for Harry. Raven always sent him something at breakfast while Hermione and Ginny kept a close eye on his food intake. He visited Snape each night and they'd work together to find some form of Dreamless Sleep that would block his nightmares – although, really, it was Snape that did all the work while Harry tried the new concoctions out and let him know whether or not the last one worked. They finally found the concoction sometime just before Hallowe'en and, in mid-November, Snape declared that he looked well enough to stop drinking the Nutritional Potion.
Harry still spent time with his friends, of course, and played quidditch, since Dumbledore had revoked his ban. He also started actually sitting down and doing his homework without Hermione needing to pester him, which gave her more time to get on Ron's case. (Expectedly, this made Hermione his newest fan, but Ron was pretty sour with him for a few weeks.) The Headmaster would also invite Harry up for tea every other week or so and they'd discuss things like classes, Raven, Voldemort and Harry's lack of visions. (Dumbledore's admittance the year before about his caring so much for Harry explained the older wizard's new attitude, but Harry rather wished the man hadn't taken to prying into Harry's love life, what little there was too it. Harry didn't appreciate the old man trying to find out more about Raven – or Riddle – especially when Harry only had so many lies to protect that secret.)
Shortly after Hallowe'en, news made it through the grapevine to Harry that Grimmauld Place was gone. Some of Voldemort's people had gotten suspicious of the various Order members who were using the muggle area as a through-way and, although the building itself was unplottable and under the Fidelius Charm, the buildings on either side weren't. The Death Eaters had ended up just blindly shooting spells at where number twelve should have been, killing seven muggles and two Order members. Three more Order members and who knew how many muggles had been seriously wounded, and the building the Order had been using as Headquarters was no longer usable. (Harry hadn't know any of the Order members who'd been killed and only vaguely recognised the name of one who'd been wounded, so he wasn't really bothered by the whole thing.)
On December first, Dumbledore made the announcement that everyone would have to go home over the Christmas holidays. All of the students had been aware of the pinging on the wards around the school as various Death Eaters tried to find a weakness – to please Voldemort, Harry had heard, though the man in question seemed quite displeased by the attacks on the school, from what Starlight said – and Dumbledore assured them that the break would be used to completely revamp the wards so there wouldn't be any question of whether or not Voldemort and his people would get in.
"However," he said with a crestfallen expression, "I'm afraid this means you will all have to return home. When we fix the wards, the school will be briefly open to attack. There will be aurors to help guard against any Death Eaters, but both the Ministry and your professors have agreed that it would be best if there were no students on the grounds. As a precaution. We don't want to jeopardise your safety, after all."
Harry was antsy for the next few days, making his friends look at him in concern. "You can always stay with us," Ron suggested. Ginny nodded next to him. "Mum would love to have you."
Harry smiled and nodded. "Thanks. I'd like to check with Dumbledore first, though."
"Professor Dumbledore," Hermione corrected, not bothering to look up from her Arithmancy text. She only really corrected them out of habit, anymore, and didn't even bother when it was Snape Ron or Harry was speaking of.
"Him," Harry agreed, pulling off his glasses and wiping at the lenses with a corner of his robes. He didn't need them anymore, but that didn't mean he wasn't looking through the glass. "I've got a meeting with him tomorrow afternoon, anyway."
Dumbledore was actually the person to bring the holiday up, "Harry, I'd like you to return to the Dursleys for Christmas break."
Harry jerked and spilled tea from his cup, which he then carefully set back on the other's desk. He grabbed a napkin to dab at the wet spot in his lap and asked, "Sir? Couldn't I stay with Ron and Ginny? Their parents won't mind."
Dumbledore sighed and shook his head. "The Burrow, I'm afraid, doesn't have the required wards to keep you safe. Without Grimmauld Place, and with Hogwarts being closed, your aunt's house is the safest place for you."
Harry wanted to shout at him about how he'd been almost blinded over the summer, and didn't that make the Dursleys the least safe place for him? But Harry didn't, because he didn't want to disappoint Dumbledore. What sort of saviour was half-blinded by a muggle?
And Harry didn't want to force the Weasleys to have to pay for wards they couldn't afford, nor did he want to chance an attack on the Burrow, even if he did think that Riddle wouldn't do that. Not now.
"Is there no way for me to stay here, sir? I can stay hidden..."
Dumbledore shook his head, looking terribly wounded. "I'm afraid not, my dear boy. The risk is just too great."
Harry nodded and picked up his cup to sip at his tea some more, but it tasted cold and bitter, and the biscuits on the tray between them looked vile. Harry swallowed and forced himself to finish his tea and make light conversation, then wished the Headmaster a good holiday and left.
Snape found him two hours later when he didn't attend dinner. Harry was seated in one of the windows of the owlery, Hedwig sitting on his knee. Neither wizard nor owl looked well, and Snape could see the faintest traces of tear tracks on Harry's face. "Potter?" he said from a distance, making sure the half-blind boy knew he was there.
Harry turned to look at his, eyes hollow. "Sir?"
"You missed supper," Snape said carefully, stepping around some moulted feathers to get to the boy at the window. "Miss Weasley and Granger are looking all over for you."
Harry smiled bitterly. "Ah." He looked back out the window. "I wasn't hungry."
"They won't appreciate that response," Snape commented drily, leaning against the opposite side of the window frame.
Harry shrugged. "They'll yell," he agreed, "and force some rolls down my throat. Perhaps a pie, if Hermione thought to grab one, or whatever meat and veggies Ginny slipped into a pocket."
Snape eyed the teen critically. "This is about the announcement the Headmaster made a few days ago," he deduced.
Harry inclined his head. "I am to return to my aunt and uncle's house."
"You didn't tell him about your uncle?" Snape demanded.
Harry smiled. "There's nowhere else for me to go," he replied.
Snape looked out the window. "For your sake, Potter, I hope you don't lose anything else for your silence."
Harry nodded. "As do I," he said and smoothed Hedwig's feathers, which had puffed up angrily at the mention of the occurrences of the summer.
-0-0-0-
Curiously, it was Tonks that fought the hardest against Harry's return to the Dursleys, from what Snape told him. She'd suggested everything from fronting the money herself to update the wards at the Weasleys, to taking Harry on a trip out of the country for the holiday.
But Dumbledore had refused, and Harry thought the steel that Snape had reported being in his voice when he denied Tonks' plea odd, but thought little of it. He also thought little of Tonks' reasonings behind her pleas.
He thought little of anything, actually, as he packed his things for the train ride back to London.
-0-0-0-
Vernon wasn't happy, but nor was particularly inclined to start anything with the promise of Harry being able to get away with using magic hanging over his head. There were rules set down about Harry disappearing when guests were by, but other than that, there were only the usual chores Harry was given when he was home. So Harry did his chores and stayed out of his family's way. Whenever Riddle or one of his friends would owl, asking how he was doing, Harry would always respond positively, and he knew the only reason Riddle hadn't intervened in any way was because Starlight hadn't reported anything really wrong.
Two days before Christmas, the promised guests were expected by. Their visit meant a potential deal for Vernon's business that would put them back on the market after a particularly bad few months. Harry was ordered to make the supper and allowed a reasonable plate of food, then sent off to be silent as a mouse upstairs. He settled into his room and, after sending Hedwig and Starlight out to hunt, sat down on his bed with a book, quietly amusing himself with the imagined expressions on the guests' faces after sitting through a supper with Dudley.
Harry was just considering bed when he heard the guests leaving downstairs and he set his book to one side, intending to perform his nightly toilet rituals. He was getting up to do just that when his door opened on its own and a swaying Vernon walked in. He made to let go of the door, but stumbled a bit and grabbed back onto it to keep steady. Then he gave Harry the evil eye and hissed, "You."
Harry swallowed and stood up from his perch on his bed. Previous encounters with drunken Dursleys – usually Marge – taught him that it usually meant pain for him. "Uncle Vernon," he replied quietly.
Vernon smiled, but it wasn't a kind smile. It was the sort of smile that made Harry want to hide under his bed. "You poisoned them."
"I– I don't know–"
"You poisoned them," Vernon repeated, standing without the help of the door, certain in his drunken knowledge. "They looked ill when they left. As if they'd been poisoned."
"I– I didn't–"
"You poisoned them," he said again, sounding more certain every time he said it, as if repetition was all the evidence he needed to explain the crime. "They turned me down, because of you. Because you poisoned them."
'Shit,' Harry thought, suddenly not finding the imagined expressions of the guests at eating with Dudley so funny anymore. He knew better than to argue, so his eyes flickered instead to where an emergency portkey from Riddle sat on the corner of his desk.
Vernon's eyes flickered towards the desk, but he saw a pencil instead of the portkey – which, as muggle, he never would have recognised, nor understood what it was meant for. The pencil, to the drink-filled mind looked suspiciously like a wand and Vernon thought that Harry was considering how quickly he would have to move to grab his wand and curse Vernon dead. So Vernon did the first thing that came to mind: He bull-rushed Harry, knocking his head back against the sharp wooden headboard of his bed and knocking him out cold.
-0-0-0-
Voldemort was in his the potion lab with Snape, asking about a potion the Death Eater was developing for him when a blur of white practically ran into him. Only his quick reflexes allowed him to catch Hedwig and keep her from hurting one or both of them. Before she was even fully settled on his arm, Hedwig started explaining what she'd seen when she'd been on her way back in from hunting. While Voldemort could understand her, Snape couldn't and all he knew was that his Lord's face went from its usual mildly irritated expression, to horror and then absolute fury, with a hint of something that could be described as fear.
As soon as Voldemort got his thoughts in order, he turned to Snape, red eyes cold and murderous. "Come, Severus. You and I are getting Harry out of that death trap before Vernon finishes what he started during the summer." Hedwig let out a panicked hoot and Voldemort gently ran a hand over her head, soothing her. "Calm, luv. Once I'm through with the bastard, he won't even be able to consider hurting Harry again."
Snape took the time it took for Voldemort to calm the bird to regain his equilibrium and, by the time the Dark Lord had turned back to him, he was grabbing potions he sincerely hoped his student wouldn't need. He knew there was no time for explanations – though whether Voldemort would ever be willing to give them was another matter – so he would just do as his Lord ordered and hope he could get Potter out if he needed to.
When Snape nodded that he was ready, Voldemort held out a vial he'd grabbed off a table. Snape mentally cried at the knowledge that the vial would be useless now, after being used as a portkey, but grabbed it without a word.
Voldemort dropped the vial as soon as they landed and made to walk out from behind the bushes that had hidden their landing, but Hedwig let out a sharp note, startling him out of his rage. He gave her an odd look, like he was trying to figure out why she was there and she hooted again, more insistently. He sighed, then changed his appearance to that of Raven Desdemona.
Snape didn't even bother trying to close his mouth when it fell open. Worked for the Dark Lord? 'Raven' was the bloody Dark Lord! Snape truly hoped Potter knew that, even if it meant the fool boy was even more insane than Snape had thought previously.
"Let's go, Severus," 'Raven' ordered, stalking out from behind the bushes and jerking his arm to help Hedwig fly above them.
Snape took a moment to quickly change his clothing into something muggle, then hurried to catch up to the Dark Lord as the man reached Number Four and rang the doorbell.
A morbidly obese man opened the door, smelling strongly of alcohol. It took him a moment, but he seemed to recognise Riddle, hissing, "You," and purpling with rage.
Riddle's return smile was terrifying in its promises. "Dursley. Did I not warn you that the next time you touched Harry I would turn you inside out?"
Snape fought a shudder; Voldemort had been infamous for his use of the Pars Curse during the first war. It was a curse that would, quite literally, turn a person inside out, leaving the brains, organs and such intact, but on the wrong side of the skin. The curse kept the victim alive for almost an hour, as well, leaving them in complete agony for the entirety of it.
Vernon sneered, even more foolish behind his drunken haze. "The little freak deserved it."
Before Snape could even blink, Vernon was flying backwards, down the hall, and a furious Riddle was stepping into the house.
Snape hurried to catch up to the Dark Lord, who stopped next to a door under the stairs while Vernon stumbled to his feet and made for a part of the house that was out of sight. "He's in here," Riddle reported to Snape, tapping the door with his wand and making it pop open. "Treat him as best you can with what you've brought, then take him back to the base and leave him in my room."
"Understood, my Lord," Snape whispered, bowing.
Riddle smiled his promise-filled smile again and started after Vernon, calling, "Oh, Vernon! It's not nice to run away when we're in the middle of a pleasant conversation!" in a sickly-sweet voice.
Snape suppressed another shudder, then opened the closet door enough to actually see his patient. When he set sight on the teen crumpled in the bottom of the closet, brooms and mops criss-crossed over his head, he almost felt like going after the Dark Lord to offer his help; the boy was covered in cuts and bruises, including a nasty cut on the back of his head that Snape could barely make out through his wild hair.
"Harry..." whispered a voice from behind Snape and he whirled on the spot, wand drawn, to find Tonks looked at him with tears in her eyes. "We have to get him away from these monsters," she pleaded.
"Even if it's to the Dark Lord?" Snape hissed, turning and kneeling to administer what he could to the boy.
"At least You Know Who isn't trying to kill him right now," Tonks practically growled. "Fuck, the bastard cares for Harry more that Dumbledore does right now, seems like."
Harry's hopeless words from months before came back to Snape: 'Do you have any idea what it feels like to finally have someone who sees you as you, and not some image based on hearsay? To have someone who cares about you, and will risk everything to let you and everyone around you know it?' and he nodded. "Indeed he does."
In silent agreement, the two Order members set about feeding Harry the potions Snape had brought, then Snape sacrificed one of his empty vials to make a new portkey back to the base. Once certain everyone was touching it, Snape activated the device, then helped hoist Harry from where they'd landed in his potions lab down the hall to the bed in the Dark Lord's room. He left Tonks to watch over Harry while he got some more potions, then they set about feeding the new dose to the boy, then sat back to wait.
Harry woke before the Dark Lord returned and he blinked between them blearily for a long moment before whispering, "Raven?"
Tonks and Snape traded startled looks, then Tonks offered, "Returning your relatives to their original cell structure, with any luck."
"They're certainly not alive any longer," Voldemort informed them all from the doorway, silently waving his wand to change his clothing back to that of a wizard. "If I may ask, Severus, why is Dumbledore's pet auror here?"
"Because someone needs to make sure you're treating Harry right, Mister 'Raven Desdemona'," Tonks replied coolly before Snape could even formulate a response.
Harry paled. "Tonks, please–"
"Harry, dear heart, hush," the Dark Lord whispered, already moving to Harry's side before the boy had gotten the first word out, snake-like face creased with concern.
"I'm not going to tell Albus, Harry," Tonks assured the boy. "But I'd feel better if there was someone here who wasn't either firmly on His side, or straddling the line." Her eyes flickered up at the Dark Lord, who had eyes only for Harry.
"I can take care of myself just fine, thanks," Harry retorted with a scowl.
"Yes, we've all seen how well you can take care of yourself," Voldemort teased with a smile.
While Snape and Tonks were left speechless at the impossible smile, Harry informed the Dark Lord, "You look creepy. If you're going to smile, please do so as yourself, Tom."
The Dark Lord was so surprised at hearing his given name from the young man who'd only ever called him Riddle, that he switched back to his normal, more human form before he fully thought about it. When Harry shot him a victorious smile, he scowled and muttered, "Brat."
Harry's smile widened. "Yup."
Riddle kissed him, smirking when Harry turned bright red, then he looked up at Snape and Tonks, eyes hard. "I don't care if one of your little friends stays here while Harry is here, but you will be restricted to this room unless I say otherwise, and Harry won't be forced into anything he doesn't want to do. Am I clear?"
Snape and Tonks both nodded.
"What about Dumbledore?" Harry asked softly and the others all looked at him questioningly. "Well, Tom, you just killed my relatives. What's Dumbledore going to do when he finds them dead and me gone?"
"Who says he ever even has to find out?" Tonks replied. "Remus, Mad-Eye and I are the ones assigned to watching you, and as long as none of us tell Albus what's up, he'll never know."
"I didn't cast the Mark," Riddle agreed quietly. "And there are ways to bribe the muggle authorities to keep their noses out of our business. Obliviates can sort out the neighbours and co-workers and classmates can be told they've moved out of the country. Unexpected trip. They don't plan on coming back. Something like that."
Harry swallowed. "How can you say all that so easily?" he asked, eyes sad.
"I learned from the best," Riddle said coolly, pushing away from the bed and motioning to the only woman in the room. "Auror Tonks, I'll show you the floo terminal that you and your partners will be using."
Once Riddle and Tonks were gone, Harry turned to Snape. "Who might he have learned from, sir?"
"Our Ministry and Dumbledore are, by no means, as clean as they might wish the public to believe, Mr Potter."
Harry nodded, recalling the muggles at the Qudditch World Cup who the Ministry workers had continuously obliviated, and his Aunt Marge, who had been obliviated to silence her. No, perhaps the Dark Lord wasn't the only problem in their world. " 'There is no good or evil, only power, and those too weak to seek it,' " he whispered.
"Indeed."
They both fell silent and Harry turned over to sleep.
-0-0-0-
For Christmas, Harry got a book about how to play chess from Ginny, candy from Ron, a small diary/notebook from Hermione, the usual from Mrs Weasley and a batch of rock cakes from Hagrid. Tonks, Mad-Eye and Remus pooled together to get him a wizarding wireless while Riddle got him a bouquet of white roses and a wand holster for him arm.
Snape, however, went all out and got Harry and the Dark Lord a set of matching serpent rings that could speak to one another, rather like a set of muggle walkie-talkies. When Riddle had asked why while Harry admired them, Snape had commented that it would be faster in emergencies.
Harry decided that the day rated as one of his best Christmases ever, especially when both Remus and Tonks came for a visit, despite it being Mad-Eye's turn, to spend it with it. It helped that everyone agreed to put aside any differences for the night and they enjoyed a party and spoke about Christmases past.
Eventually, Remus and Mad-Eye retired through the floo for the night, Snape returned to his own room in the manor and Tonks allowed herself to be sent to an adjoining room by a smiling Riddle.
"Did you have a good day, dear heart?" Riddle asked while Harry set about putting his new things in his retrieved trunk at the end of the bed he was still using; Riddle had taken to sleeping on the couch in his office, which was next door, as he'd felt no need to make Harry move to another room when he was comfortable where he was.
"I did," Harry agreed with a bright smile. "Thank you, Tom."
Riddle smiled back. "Of course."
Harry chewed his lip for a moment, uncertain, and asked, "You don't want anything, do you? In exchange for behaving all day? I know you don't care for Tonks and Remus and Mad-Eye..."
Riddle laughed and stood from where he'd been sitting on the bed and walked over to Harry. "Dear heart, your mere presence has made this the most precious Christmas I've ever had. Playing nice with your friends was a small price to pay." He leaned down to steal a kiss. "Although, a return of your smile would always be nice," he teased.
Harry attempted a smile and mostly succeeded until he recalled that Riddle was, really, just as lonely as he was.
Riddle gently brushed a lock of hair from Harry's face. "What is it?" he asked, worried by the troubled look in the expressive green eyes.
Harry buried his face is Riddle's chest and clung to him. 'Why must our lives be so twisted and fucked up?'
Harry didn't realise he'd spoken aloud until Riddle offered, "Because the world needed someone to throw the crap no one else wanted upon." He hooked his fingers under Harry's chin and forced the tear-filled green eyes to meet his own serious red ones. "There's nothing we can do but learn to shoulder all the shit sat upon us and laugh in their faces once they realise they can't keep us down."
Harry hid his face against Riddle's chest again. "I'm sorry," he whispered, almost too soft for Riddle to hear.
Riddle sighed and picked Harry up then set him on the bed, kneeling next to him. "Harry, don't apologise for others; it only hurts yourself."
Harry let out a sniffle and a reluctant nod.
Riddle kissed his forehead and stood. "Get some sle–" He stopped when a too small hand clamped around his wrist. "Yes?"
Pleading green eyes looked up at him. "Don't go? I don't want to be alone."
Riddle didn't think to mention that Tonks was just next door or that Hedwig was in the corner, mere feet away. Rather, he pulled off his over-robe and dropped it over a nearby chair before climbing into the large bed and drawing Harry against him. He was all too aware of what it felt like to feel completely alone, even when you were surrounded by so many others.
Harry gripped Riddle's cotton shirt and took a deep breath. "Thank you."
"Of course, dear heart. Of course."
-0-0-0-
Tonks took great care to not wake the two sleeping wizards when she left to meet Remus at the floo the next morning. She'd heard everything last night and she'd decided that they deserved their rest.
"Left your post unguarded?" Remus teased when he stepped from the fireplace.
"They're sleeping," Tonks replied with a shrug.
Remus' eyebrows rose. "They?"
Tonks sighed and explained what had happened after the others had all left.
Remus' expression had turned grim by the time Tonks finished. "The shit of the universe certainly does fall upon them."
"What happened?" Snape asked. He'd walked in some time during the middle of Tonks' retelling and the other two hadn't been bothered enough to try kicking him out.
"Albus wants to drop by the Dursleys today. Mad-Eye's trying to talk him out of it," Remus explained wearily.
"You don't think it's going to work," Snape deciphered.
"They're finishing the re-warding today," Remus replied. "He won't have anything to keep him at the school after lunch, and you know how Albus gets once he's got an idea in his mind." The other two nodded.
"So we have until lunch to figure out how to protect Harry and Riddle from being found out," Tonks commented, using the name she'd picked up from Harry for their host.
"What are you thinking, you mad woman?" Snape demanded.
Tonks smiled crookedly. "We all return to the house. I'll pretend to be Petunia while one of you two or Riddle play Dudley and Vernon. The Dursleys absolutely abhorred magic, so we can just stay out of sight while Albus is there talking to Harry."
"The idea has merit," Snape allowed.
"We've got five hours. Let's wake Harry and Riddle and get started," Remus ordered.
The other two nodded and together they went to wake the Dark Lord and Harry and tell them what was going on.
-0-0-0-0-0-
A/N: I'm going to stop making promises about when chapters are going to be up. Is that okay? Because I fail at that all of a sudden.
For anyone who hasn't figured it out for themselves yet – or is just living under a rock – I'm in a bit of a non-writing rut of late. I haven't been feeling like writing and forcing it won't give me anything pretty to read, so I've not bothered. I'm hoping that, once Shara and I manage to find jobs and can, therefore, expect to continue to have a place to live and food to eat, I'll feel a bit more like writing. I hope. (On the other hand, if we can't find jobs, I might very well soon find myself without a computer, so I suppose it won't matter if I want to write anymore, yeah? XD)
End drama. XP
I'll work on typing up the next chapter when I can. I've only got two more chapters before I have to start making stuff up, so let's just hope I get ideas before then. ('Course, with the way this fic's been going, I can probably draw this out another year, maybe two... *headdesk*)
BUT I LOVE YOU ALL, ANYWAY!!!
~Bats ^.^x
Chapters:
One ||| Two ||| Three ||| Four ||| Five
Six ||| Seven ||| Eight
Incomplete
Author:
batsutousaiRating: M/R
Pairings: Tom/Harry, others
Warnings: Clearly AU, OOCness, child abuse, anti-Dumbledore, pro-Hermione and Ron and Ginny
Summary: Even heroes need a saviour, and when an unknown admirer starts sending Harry letters the summer before his sixth year, it's time for Harry to meet his.
Disclaim Her: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
A/N: Sorry this took so long? I'm a lazy sod. But you knew that already.
Some parts of this chapter were given a serious rewrite – or expansion, mostly – from what's in my notebook. So if things are a little wonky from the rest of the fic, I apologise, but I didn't feel like re-reading when I was mostly going from the notebook. ^.^"
Also, the end of this hasn't been looked over again after being typed up. I figured you all be happier to get this now, rather than wait a couple hours for me to sleep, then read it all back over. *sweatdrop*
-0-0-0-
The next few months were a blur for Harry. Raven always sent him something at breakfast while Hermione and Ginny kept a close eye on his food intake. He visited Snape each night and they'd work together to find some form of Dreamless Sleep that would block his nightmares – although, really, it was Snape that did all the work while Harry tried the new concoctions out and let him know whether or not the last one worked. They finally found the concoction sometime just before Hallowe'en and, in mid-November, Snape declared that he looked well enough to stop drinking the Nutritional Potion.
Harry still spent time with his friends, of course, and played quidditch, since Dumbledore had revoked his ban. He also started actually sitting down and doing his homework without Hermione needing to pester him, which gave her more time to get on Ron's case. (Expectedly, this made Hermione his newest fan, but Ron was pretty sour with him for a few weeks.) The Headmaster would also invite Harry up for tea every other week or so and they'd discuss things like classes, Raven, Voldemort and Harry's lack of visions. (Dumbledore's admittance the year before about his caring so much for Harry explained the older wizard's new attitude, but Harry rather wished the man hadn't taken to prying into Harry's love life, what little there was too it. Harry didn't appreciate the old man trying to find out more about Raven – or Riddle – especially when Harry only had so many lies to protect that secret.)
Shortly after Hallowe'en, news made it through the grapevine to Harry that Grimmauld Place was gone. Some of Voldemort's people had gotten suspicious of the various Order members who were using the muggle area as a through-way and, although the building itself was unplottable and under the Fidelius Charm, the buildings on either side weren't. The Death Eaters had ended up just blindly shooting spells at where number twelve should have been, killing seven muggles and two Order members. Three more Order members and who knew how many muggles had been seriously wounded, and the building the Order had been using as Headquarters was no longer usable. (Harry hadn't know any of the Order members who'd been killed and only vaguely recognised the name of one who'd been wounded, so he wasn't really bothered by the whole thing.)
On December first, Dumbledore made the announcement that everyone would have to go home over the Christmas holidays. All of the students had been aware of the pinging on the wards around the school as various Death Eaters tried to find a weakness – to please Voldemort, Harry had heard, though the man in question seemed quite displeased by the attacks on the school, from what Starlight said – and Dumbledore assured them that the break would be used to completely revamp the wards so there wouldn't be any question of whether or not Voldemort and his people would get in.
"However," he said with a crestfallen expression, "I'm afraid this means you will all have to return home. When we fix the wards, the school will be briefly open to attack. There will be aurors to help guard against any Death Eaters, but both the Ministry and your professors have agreed that it would be best if there were no students on the grounds. As a precaution. We don't want to jeopardise your safety, after all."
Harry was antsy for the next few days, making his friends look at him in concern. "You can always stay with us," Ron suggested. Ginny nodded next to him. "Mum would love to have you."
Harry smiled and nodded. "Thanks. I'd like to check with Dumbledore first, though."
"Professor Dumbledore," Hermione corrected, not bothering to look up from her Arithmancy text. She only really corrected them out of habit, anymore, and didn't even bother when it was Snape Ron or Harry was speaking of.
"Him," Harry agreed, pulling off his glasses and wiping at the lenses with a corner of his robes. He didn't need them anymore, but that didn't mean he wasn't looking through the glass. "I've got a meeting with him tomorrow afternoon, anyway."
Dumbledore was actually the person to bring the holiday up, "Harry, I'd like you to return to the Dursleys for Christmas break."
Harry jerked and spilled tea from his cup, which he then carefully set back on the other's desk. He grabbed a napkin to dab at the wet spot in his lap and asked, "Sir? Couldn't I stay with Ron and Ginny? Their parents won't mind."
Dumbledore sighed and shook his head. "The Burrow, I'm afraid, doesn't have the required wards to keep you safe. Without Grimmauld Place, and with Hogwarts being closed, your aunt's house is the safest place for you."
Harry wanted to shout at him about how he'd been almost blinded over the summer, and didn't that make the Dursleys the least safe place for him? But Harry didn't, because he didn't want to disappoint Dumbledore. What sort of saviour was half-blinded by a muggle?
And Harry didn't want to force the Weasleys to have to pay for wards they couldn't afford, nor did he want to chance an attack on the Burrow, even if he did think that Riddle wouldn't do that. Not now.
"Is there no way for me to stay here, sir? I can stay hidden..."
Dumbledore shook his head, looking terribly wounded. "I'm afraid not, my dear boy. The risk is just too great."
Harry nodded and picked up his cup to sip at his tea some more, but it tasted cold and bitter, and the biscuits on the tray between them looked vile. Harry swallowed and forced himself to finish his tea and make light conversation, then wished the Headmaster a good holiday and left.
Snape found him two hours later when he didn't attend dinner. Harry was seated in one of the windows of the owlery, Hedwig sitting on his knee. Neither wizard nor owl looked well, and Snape could see the faintest traces of tear tracks on Harry's face. "Potter?" he said from a distance, making sure the half-blind boy knew he was there.
Harry turned to look at his, eyes hollow. "Sir?"
"You missed supper," Snape said carefully, stepping around some moulted feathers to get to the boy at the window. "Miss Weasley and Granger are looking all over for you."
Harry smiled bitterly. "Ah." He looked back out the window. "I wasn't hungry."
"They won't appreciate that response," Snape commented drily, leaning against the opposite side of the window frame.
Harry shrugged. "They'll yell," he agreed, "and force some rolls down my throat. Perhaps a pie, if Hermione thought to grab one, or whatever meat and veggies Ginny slipped into a pocket."
Snape eyed the teen critically. "This is about the announcement the Headmaster made a few days ago," he deduced.
Harry inclined his head. "I am to return to my aunt and uncle's house."
"You didn't tell him about your uncle?" Snape demanded.
Harry smiled. "There's nowhere else for me to go," he replied.
Snape looked out the window. "For your sake, Potter, I hope you don't lose anything else for your silence."
Harry nodded. "As do I," he said and smoothed Hedwig's feathers, which had puffed up angrily at the mention of the occurrences of the summer.
Curiously, it was Tonks that fought the hardest against Harry's return to the Dursleys, from what Snape told him. She'd suggested everything from fronting the money herself to update the wards at the Weasleys, to taking Harry on a trip out of the country for the holiday.
But Dumbledore had refused, and Harry thought the steel that Snape had reported being in his voice when he denied Tonks' plea odd, but thought little of it. He also thought little of Tonks' reasonings behind her pleas.
He thought little of anything, actually, as he packed his things for the train ride back to London.
Vernon wasn't happy, but nor was particularly inclined to start anything with the promise of Harry being able to get away with using magic hanging over his head. There were rules set down about Harry disappearing when guests were by, but other than that, there were only the usual chores Harry was given when he was home. So Harry did his chores and stayed out of his family's way. Whenever Riddle or one of his friends would owl, asking how he was doing, Harry would always respond positively, and he knew the only reason Riddle hadn't intervened in any way was because Starlight hadn't reported anything really wrong.
Two days before Christmas, the promised guests were expected by. Their visit meant a potential deal for Vernon's business that would put them back on the market after a particularly bad few months. Harry was ordered to make the supper and allowed a reasonable plate of food, then sent off to be silent as a mouse upstairs. He settled into his room and, after sending Hedwig and Starlight out to hunt, sat down on his bed with a book, quietly amusing himself with the imagined expressions on the guests' faces after sitting through a supper with Dudley.
Harry was just considering bed when he heard the guests leaving downstairs and he set his book to one side, intending to perform his nightly toilet rituals. He was getting up to do just that when his door opened on its own and a swaying Vernon walked in. He made to let go of the door, but stumbled a bit and grabbed back onto it to keep steady. Then he gave Harry the evil eye and hissed, "You."
Harry swallowed and stood up from his perch on his bed. Previous encounters with drunken Dursleys – usually Marge – taught him that it usually meant pain for him. "Uncle Vernon," he replied quietly.
Vernon smiled, but it wasn't a kind smile. It was the sort of smile that made Harry want to hide under his bed. "You poisoned them."
"I– I don't know–"
"You poisoned them," Vernon repeated, standing without the help of the door, certain in his drunken knowledge. "They looked ill when they left. As if they'd been poisoned."
"I– I didn't–"
"You poisoned them," he said again, sounding more certain every time he said it, as if repetition was all the evidence he needed to explain the crime. "They turned me down, because of you. Because you poisoned them."
'Shit,' Harry thought, suddenly not finding the imagined expressions of the guests at eating with Dudley so funny anymore. He knew better than to argue, so his eyes flickered instead to where an emergency portkey from Riddle sat on the corner of his desk.
Vernon's eyes flickered towards the desk, but he saw a pencil instead of the portkey – which, as muggle, he never would have recognised, nor understood what it was meant for. The pencil, to the drink-filled mind looked suspiciously like a wand and Vernon thought that Harry was considering how quickly he would have to move to grab his wand and curse Vernon dead. So Vernon did the first thing that came to mind: He bull-rushed Harry, knocking his head back against the sharp wooden headboard of his bed and knocking him out cold.
Voldemort was in his the potion lab with Snape, asking about a potion the Death Eater was developing for him when a blur of white practically ran into him. Only his quick reflexes allowed him to catch Hedwig and keep her from hurting one or both of them. Before she was even fully settled on his arm, Hedwig started explaining what she'd seen when she'd been on her way back in from hunting. While Voldemort could understand her, Snape couldn't and all he knew was that his Lord's face went from its usual mildly irritated expression, to horror and then absolute fury, with a hint of something that could be described as fear.
As soon as Voldemort got his thoughts in order, he turned to Snape, red eyes cold and murderous. "Come, Severus. You and I are getting Harry out of that death trap before Vernon finishes what he started during the summer." Hedwig let out a panicked hoot and Voldemort gently ran a hand over her head, soothing her. "Calm, luv. Once I'm through with the bastard, he won't even be able to consider hurting Harry again."
Snape took the time it took for Voldemort to calm the bird to regain his equilibrium and, by the time the Dark Lord had turned back to him, he was grabbing potions he sincerely hoped his student wouldn't need. He knew there was no time for explanations – though whether Voldemort would ever be willing to give them was another matter – so he would just do as his Lord ordered and hope he could get Potter out if he needed to.
When Snape nodded that he was ready, Voldemort held out a vial he'd grabbed off a table. Snape mentally cried at the knowledge that the vial would be useless now, after being used as a portkey, but grabbed it without a word.
Voldemort dropped the vial as soon as they landed and made to walk out from behind the bushes that had hidden their landing, but Hedwig let out a sharp note, startling him out of his rage. He gave her an odd look, like he was trying to figure out why she was there and she hooted again, more insistently. He sighed, then changed his appearance to that of Raven Desdemona.
Snape didn't even bother trying to close his mouth when it fell open. Worked for the Dark Lord? 'Raven' was the bloody Dark Lord! Snape truly hoped Potter knew that, even if it meant the fool boy was even more insane than Snape had thought previously.
"Let's go, Severus," 'Raven' ordered, stalking out from behind the bushes and jerking his arm to help Hedwig fly above them.
Snape took a moment to quickly change his clothing into something muggle, then hurried to catch up to the Dark Lord as the man reached Number Four and rang the doorbell.
A morbidly obese man opened the door, smelling strongly of alcohol. It took him a moment, but he seemed to recognise Riddle, hissing, "You," and purpling with rage.
Riddle's return smile was terrifying in its promises. "Dursley. Did I not warn you that the next time you touched Harry I would turn you inside out?"
Snape fought a shudder; Voldemort had been infamous for his use of the Pars Curse during the first war. It was a curse that would, quite literally, turn a person inside out, leaving the brains, organs and such intact, but on the wrong side of the skin. The curse kept the victim alive for almost an hour, as well, leaving them in complete agony for the entirety of it.
Vernon sneered, even more foolish behind his drunken haze. "The little freak deserved it."
Before Snape could even blink, Vernon was flying backwards, down the hall, and a furious Riddle was stepping into the house.
Snape hurried to catch up to the Dark Lord, who stopped next to a door under the stairs while Vernon stumbled to his feet and made for a part of the house that was out of sight. "He's in here," Riddle reported to Snape, tapping the door with his wand and making it pop open. "Treat him as best you can with what you've brought, then take him back to the base and leave him in my room."
"Understood, my Lord," Snape whispered, bowing.
Riddle smiled his promise-filled smile again and started after Vernon, calling, "Oh, Vernon! It's not nice to run away when we're in the middle of a pleasant conversation!" in a sickly-sweet voice.
Snape suppressed another shudder, then opened the closet door enough to actually see his patient. When he set sight on the teen crumpled in the bottom of the closet, brooms and mops criss-crossed over his head, he almost felt like going after the Dark Lord to offer his help; the boy was covered in cuts and bruises, including a nasty cut on the back of his head that Snape could barely make out through his wild hair.
"Harry..." whispered a voice from behind Snape and he whirled on the spot, wand drawn, to find Tonks looked at him with tears in her eyes. "We have to get him away from these monsters," she pleaded.
"Even if it's to the Dark Lord?" Snape hissed, turning and kneeling to administer what he could to the boy.
"At least You Know Who isn't trying to kill him right now," Tonks practically growled. "Fuck, the bastard cares for Harry more that Dumbledore does right now, seems like."
Harry's hopeless words from months before came back to Snape: 'Do you have any idea what it feels like to finally have someone who sees you as you, and not some image based on hearsay? To have someone who cares about you, and will risk everything to let you and everyone around you know it?' and he nodded. "Indeed he does."
In silent agreement, the two Order members set about feeding Harry the potions Snape had brought, then Snape sacrificed one of his empty vials to make a new portkey back to the base. Once certain everyone was touching it, Snape activated the device, then helped hoist Harry from where they'd landed in his potions lab down the hall to the bed in the Dark Lord's room. He left Tonks to watch over Harry while he got some more potions, then they set about feeding the new dose to the boy, then sat back to wait.
Harry woke before the Dark Lord returned and he blinked between them blearily for a long moment before whispering, "Raven?"
Tonks and Snape traded startled looks, then Tonks offered, "Returning your relatives to their original cell structure, with any luck."
"They're certainly not alive any longer," Voldemort informed them all from the doorway, silently waving his wand to change his clothing back to that of a wizard. "If I may ask, Severus, why is Dumbledore's pet auror here?"
"Because someone needs to make sure you're treating Harry right, Mister 'Raven Desdemona'," Tonks replied coolly before Snape could even formulate a response.
Harry paled. "Tonks, please–"
"Harry, dear heart, hush," the Dark Lord whispered, already moving to Harry's side before the boy had gotten the first word out, snake-like face creased with concern.
"I'm not going to tell Albus, Harry," Tonks assured the boy. "But I'd feel better if there was someone here who wasn't either firmly on His side, or straddling the line." Her eyes flickered up at the Dark Lord, who had eyes only for Harry.
"I can take care of myself just fine, thanks," Harry retorted with a scowl.
"Yes, we've all seen how well you can take care of yourself," Voldemort teased with a smile.
While Snape and Tonks were left speechless at the impossible smile, Harry informed the Dark Lord, "You look creepy. If you're going to smile, please do so as yourself, Tom."
The Dark Lord was so surprised at hearing his given name from the young man who'd only ever called him Riddle, that he switched back to his normal, more human form before he fully thought about it. When Harry shot him a victorious smile, he scowled and muttered, "Brat."
Harry's smile widened. "Yup."
Riddle kissed him, smirking when Harry turned bright red, then he looked up at Snape and Tonks, eyes hard. "I don't care if one of your little friends stays here while Harry is here, but you will be restricted to this room unless I say otherwise, and Harry won't be forced into anything he doesn't want to do. Am I clear?"
Snape and Tonks both nodded.
"What about Dumbledore?" Harry asked softly and the others all looked at him questioningly. "Well, Tom, you just killed my relatives. What's Dumbledore going to do when he finds them dead and me gone?"
"Who says he ever even has to find out?" Tonks replied. "Remus, Mad-Eye and I are the ones assigned to watching you, and as long as none of us tell Albus what's up, he'll never know."
"I didn't cast the Mark," Riddle agreed quietly. "And there are ways to bribe the muggle authorities to keep their noses out of our business. Obliviates can sort out the neighbours and co-workers and classmates can be told they've moved out of the country. Unexpected trip. They don't plan on coming back. Something like that."
Harry swallowed. "How can you say all that so easily?" he asked, eyes sad.
"I learned from the best," Riddle said coolly, pushing away from the bed and motioning to the only woman in the room. "Auror Tonks, I'll show you the floo terminal that you and your partners will be using."
Once Riddle and Tonks were gone, Harry turned to Snape. "Who might he have learned from, sir?"
"Our Ministry and Dumbledore are, by no means, as clean as they might wish the public to believe, Mr Potter."
Harry nodded, recalling the muggles at the Qudditch World Cup who the Ministry workers had continuously obliviated, and his Aunt Marge, who had been obliviated to silence her. No, perhaps the Dark Lord wasn't the only problem in their world. " 'There is no good or evil, only power, and those too weak to seek it,' " he whispered.
"Indeed."
They both fell silent and Harry turned over to sleep.
For Christmas, Harry got a book about how to play chess from Ginny, candy from Ron, a small diary/notebook from Hermione, the usual from Mrs Weasley and a batch of rock cakes from Hagrid. Tonks, Mad-Eye and Remus pooled together to get him a wizarding wireless while Riddle got him a bouquet of white roses and a wand holster for him arm.
Snape, however, went all out and got Harry and the Dark Lord a set of matching serpent rings that could speak to one another, rather like a set of muggle walkie-talkies. When Riddle had asked why while Harry admired them, Snape had commented that it would be faster in emergencies.
Harry decided that the day rated as one of his best Christmases ever, especially when both Remus and Tonks came for a visit, despite it being Mad-Eye's turn, to spend it with it. It helped that everyone agreed to put aside any differences for the night and they enjoyed a party and spoke about Christmases past.
Eventually, Remus and Mad-Eye retired through the floo for the night, Snape returned to his own room in the manor and Tonks allowed herself to be sent to an adjoining room by a smiling Riddle.
"Did you have a good day, dear heart?" Riddle asked while Harry set about putting his new things in his retrieved trunk at the end of the bed he was still using; Riddle had taken to sleeping on the couch in his office, which was next door, as he'd felt no need to make Harry move to another room when he was comfortable where he was.
"I did," Harry agreed with a bright smile. "Thank you, Tom."
Riddle smiled back. "Of course."
Harry chewed his lip for a moment, uncertain, and asked, "You don't want anything, do you? In exchange for behaving all day? I know you don't care for Tonks and Remus and Mad-Eye..."
Riddle laughed and stood from where he'd been sitting on the bed and walked over to Harry. "Dear heart, your mere presence has made this the most precious Christmas I've ever had. Playing nice with your friends was a small price to pay." He leaned down to steal a kiss. "Although, a return of your smile would always be nice," he teased.
Harry attempted a smile and mostly succeeded until he recalled that Riddle was, really, just as lonely as he was.
Riddle gently brushed a lock of hair from Harry's face. "What is it?" he asked, worried by the troubled look in the expressive green eyes.
Harry buried his face is Riddle's chest and clung to him. 'Why must our lives be so twisted and fucked up?'
Harry didn't realise he'd spoken aloud until Riddle offered, "Because the world needed someone to throw the crap no one else wanted upon." He hooked his fingers under Harry's chin and forced the tear-filled green eyes to meet his own serious red ones. "There's nothing we can do but learn to shoulder all the shit sat upon us and laugh in their faces once they realise they can't keep us down."
Harry hid his face against Riddle's chest again. "I'm sorry," he whispered, almost too soft for Riddle to hear.
Riddle sighed and picked Harry up then set him on the bed, kneeling next to him. "Harry, don't apologise for others; it only hurts yourself."
Harry let out a sniffle and a reluctant nod.
Riddle kissed his forehead and stood. "Get some sle–" He stopped when a too small hand clamped around his wrist. "Yes?"
Pleading green eyes looked up at him. "Don't go? I don't want to be alone."
Riddle didn't think to mention that Tonks was just next door or that Hedwig was in the corner, mere feet away. Rather, he pulled off his over-robe and dropped it over a nearby chair before climbing into the large bed and drawing Harry against him. He was all too aware of what it felt like to feel completely alone, even when you were surrounded by so many others.
Harry gripped Riddle's cotton shirt and took a deep breath. "Thank you."
"Of course, dear heart. Of course."
Tonks took great care to not wake the two sleeping wizards when she left to meet Remus at the floo the next morning. She'd heard everything last night and she'd decided that they deserved their rest.
"Left your post unguarded?" Remus teased when he stepped from the fireplace.
"They're sleeping," Tonks replied with a shrug.
Remus' eyebrows rose. "They?"
Tonks sighed and explained what had happened after the others had all left.
Remus' expression had turned grim by the time Tonks finished. "The shit of the universe certainly does fall upon them."
"What happened?" Snape asked. He'd walked in some time during the middle of Tonks' retelling and the other two hadn't been bothered enough to try kicking him out.
"Albus wants to drop by the Dursleys today. Mad-Eye's trying to talk him out of it," Remus explained wearily.
"You don't think it's going to work," Snape deciphered.
"They're finishing the re-warding today," Remus replied. "He won't have anything to keep him at the school after lunch, and you know how Albus gets once he's got an idea in his mind." The other two nodded.
"So we have until lunch to figure out how to protect Harry and Riddle from being found out," Tonks commented, using the name she'd picked up from Harry for their host.
"What are you thinking, you mad woman?" Snape demanded.
Tonks smiled crookedly. "We all return to the house. I'll pretend to be Petunia while one of you two or Riddle play Dudley and Vernon. The Dursleys absolutely abhorred magic, so we can just stay out of sight while Albus is there talking to Harry."
"The idea has merit," Snape allowed.
"We've got five hours. Let's wake Harry and Riddle and get started," Remus ordered.
The other two nodded and together they went to wake the Dark Lord and Harry and tell them what was going on.
A/N: I'm going to stop making promises about when chapters are going to be up. Is that okay? Because I fail at that all of a sudden.
For anyone who hasn't figured it out for themselves yet – or is just living under a rock – I'm in a bit of a non-writing rut of late. I haven't been feeling like writing and forcing it won't give me anything pretty to read, so I've not bothered. I'm hoping that, once Shara and I manage to find jobs and can, therefore, expect to continue to have a place to live and food to eat, I'll feel a bit more like writing. I hope. (On the other hand, if we can't find jobs, I might very well soon find myself without a computer, so I suppose it won't matter if I want to write anymore, yeah? XD)
End drama. XP
I'll work on typing up the next chapter when I can. I've only got two more chapters before I have to start making stuff up, so let's just hope I get ideas before then. ('Course, with the way this fic's been going, I can probably draw this out another year, maybe two... *headdesk*)
BUT I LOVE YOU ALL, ANYWAY!!!
~Bats ^.^x
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Incomplete
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Welcoming the return of your Muse!
Date: 16/8/10 10:54 (UTC)Such a delight to read first thing in the morning!
Re: Welcoming the return of your Muse!
Date: 16/8/10 17:37 (UTC)Yay!
Date: 16/8/10 13:23 (UTC)Re: Yay!
Date: 16/8/10 17:36 (UTC)^.~
Re: Yay!
Date: 11/1/11 01:13 (UTC)Re: Yay!
Date: 11/1/11 04:05 (UTC)How-ever has JK made you hate HP? Other than that dung-in-the-form-of-a-last-book she wrote?
no subject
Date: 16/8/10 23:22 (UTC)I thought it was abandoned abandon. This makes me so happy that you are starting to get back in the grove of things.
Good luck to you and your mate finding Jobs out there, and good luck with the new school year. ^_^
no subject
Date: 16/8/10 23:24 (UTC)I don't know that I'd say that as such, but I'm trying. It's hard to write when you just don't have the urge.
Danke!
no subject
Date: 16/8/10 23:59 (UTC)This is one of the rare times when I say do not listen to Yoda. Trying is the fun part of life. It is like practice and sometimes you have to try a couple of times get it right and then do it more for good measure. ~_-
You will find your muse and then you will be writing insanely like you did for abandon. It just decided to hibernate and rest while it is just waiting for the right plot bunny so that when it will wake up and consume your every thought again.